Obatzda: How Bavarians say “Cheese!”

I’ll come right out and say it: No body needs this recipe. I mean, there is nothing healthy about it. BUT, need is a fickle thing. If you are having a party and want an easy, make-ahead cheese dip that does not need to be kept warm; or, if you have enough pretzels in your house to feed a small school; or, if you are heading to a tailgate and want something yummy and portable that goes with any proper tailgate fare; or, if you know that sometimes “putting some cheese on it” is the answer to your cravings….well if any of those things are happening in your life right now, then you might just need this dip.

This comes straight from Dirndl Kitchen, which I figure is as legit as it gets. In good Euro fashion, it was invented as a way to use up rando bits of cheese, but it works splendidly with fresh cheese right out of the wrapper. I use whatever wheel of brie or camembert is available at the supermarket. The 1-lb wheel is perfect for a double recipe (a few grams short but this is no time for exact measurements! Just aim for a 2:1 ratio of camembert to cream cheese).

If you are looking for a way to embrace the beery cheesiness of the season, mix up a batch of this for your next hungry crowd. Happy Oktoberfesting all!

Obatzda Bavarian Cheese Dip

From Dirndl Kitchen  

Ingredients

  • 250 grams camembert cheese (8 oz ish), room temperature, with the rind left on. Or a young brie cheese, just go for the one with the farthest out expiration date.
  • 120 grams (4 oz ish) cream cheese, room temperature.
  • 10 grams butter (a little less than 1 Tbsp) , room temperature.
  • 2 Tablespoons finely chopped chives reserve a little as garnish on top
  • 2 Tablespoons finely chopped onion
  • 1 teaspoon paprika powder The ‘sweet’ kind, not spicy or smoked. Plus more for sprinting on top. Add a little bit of cayenne powder if you like some kick.
  • 100 milliliters (a little less than 1/2 cup) beer. More or less, depending on the consistency you like. I typically like a spreadable consistency unless I serve it as a dip at parties. I used Paulaner Lager.

Method:

Bring all ingredients to room temperature (either by waiting or putting in them microwave for a few seconds). Using a fork, or a potato masher, mash together the cheese (rind and all), cream cheese and butter until you have a chunky paste-like consistency.

Add in the onions and chives and paprika and continue mixing/mashing until combined. Finally add in just enough beer to bring to a spreadable consistency. Add more beer if using a dip for parties etc.

Garnish with paprika powder and chopped chives. Serve with whatever pretzels you have. Extra credit for homemade. My go-to is this pretzel beer bubble bread, also from Dirndl Kitchen, which makes very manageable and delicious pretzel nuggets that you can also freeze before baking. Veggies are a solid dipping choice too.

Bringing it, storing it:

Some recipes say to make it up to a day ahead to let the flavors blend. Handy if you want to prep ahead, but it is also delish when freshly made. Leftovers can be kept tightly covered in the fridge for up to 3 days (easily a week in my house).

Sides of Summer

It’s here people—the weekend we’ve been both dreading and building towards all summer: Dreading because it means summer is over and we have to start returning calls; building towards because by now we are on our summer cookout/picnic A-Game.

We’ll let the main course be whatever gets thrown on the grill, and think about the all-important sides. I wanted to send you into the weekend with some old favorites and one new (to Bring It) classic.

No list of BBQ sides is complete without Hero Slaw because, duh. When cooking is not happening, Picnic Perfect Broccoli Salad and Grated Carrots Ooh La-La are fresh, crisp, healthy contenders. Speaking of broccoli, Way Bettah Broccoli Salad is a healthier (and mayo-free) take on that guilty pleasure in the deli case.

I never met a smashed potato I didn’t like, incuding these Party Time Smashed Potatoes (which you can also put on oiled foil and cook on the grill for the baking step). The easy peasy lime crema dipping sauce is a must.

It’s hard to mess up anything with peak summer tomatoes, but take them over the top with this Chili Crisp Tomato Dumpling Salad. If caprese is your thing, give it a twist with this no recipe recipe for Peach Caprese Salad. And if watermelon and tomatoes are both your thing, the Summer Perfection Watermelon Tomato Feta Salad is definitely your thing.

And finally, we need to talk about corn, because otherwise the BBQ police might come for me. Ideally, you’re getting ears and ears of fresh corn and grilling or steaming it to perfection. But for an off-the-cob alternative, you can’t go wrong with Charred and Raw Corn Salad (pay no mind to the exceptionally dark and horrible picture). For the truly devoted you can mainline corn with this one ingredient Corn Butter.

I hope you find something in this compilation to make or remake. That said, we all like something new for Back-to-school. Sooooo, here is a recipe I have been making on repeat since rediscovering in the Tupperware fest that is ski lodge lunch last winter (thank you Hope!) I like a lot of things about this salad, the first of course being its ease. It also keeps well and is eminently riffable with whatever vegetables you like. It travels well, works in any season and is not picky about temperature. All in all, it’s a road warrior and a Bring It all-star.

You are now well-armed with some options. However you spend this fine weekend I hope it is fabulous!

Curried Couscous or Quinoa Salad

From Ina Garten and Healthy Gluten-Free Family

  • 1 ½ cups couscous (or 1 cup dry quinoa, see note)
  • 1 tablespoon unsalted butter
  • 1 ½ cups boiling water
  • ¼  cup plain yogurt (*not Greek)
  • ¼  cup good olive oil
  • 1 teaspoon white wine vinegar
  • 1 teaspoon curry powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground turmeric
  • 1 ½ teaspoons kosher salt
  • 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
  • ½ cup small-diced carrots
  • ½ cup minced fresh flat-leaf parsley
  • ½ cup dried currants, raisins, or dried cranberries
  • ¼ cup blanched, sliced almonds
  • 2 scallions, thinly sliced (white and green parts)
  • ¼ cup small-diced red onion

*if Greek yogurt is what you’ve got, add 1 Tbsp water to the dressing to smooth it out.

Directions

  1. Place the couscous in a medium bowl. Melt the butter in the boiling water and pour over the couscous. Cover tightly and allow the couscous to soak for 5 minutes. Fluff with a fork. If using quinoa, see note below.
  2. Whisk together the yogurt, olive oil, vinegar, curry, turmeric, salt, and pepper. Pour over the fluffed couscous, and mix well with a fork. Add the carrots, parsley, currants, almonds, scallions, and red onions, mix well, and season to taste. Serve at room temperature.

Note: I typically make this with quinoa, using 1 cup dry quinoa cooked in 2 cups water, which yields 3 cups quinoa. This is my fave method, thanks to Cookie and Kate:

Use twice as much water as quinoa, as usual, then cook uncovered until the quinoa has absorbed all the water. The cooking time will vary based on quantity.

Once the water is all absorbed, remove the pot from heat, cover it and let the quinoa steam for 5 minutes. That’s when the quinoa pops open into fluffy quinoa perfection, and that is how to cook quinoa properly.

Appropriately Dressed

How summer meals come to the table

The best part of summer cooking? Not doing it! I love the DIY and nontraditional aspect of creating summer meals with minimal actual cooking. It’s good sport to see how far you can push it without turning on the stove or oven, without going to an actual grocery store and without having any meal plan.

It’s fun for me, that is. I suspect my family hates this daily game of chance but, last I checked not one of them was starving. With a fridgeful of fresh produce, a random smattering of leftovers and a swing by the roadside farmstand, you’re never far from an epic salad or bowl or pasta dish.

When you want to turn your hodge-podge of fixin’s into an acceptable meal all you really need is a good salad dressing. Here are some of my faves, that can handle all kinds of salads from simple greens to pasta salads to pumped up, meal-sized bowls.

The dressings in this anthology are named for their purveyors, and listed in order of difficulty. But really, we’re talking dressing here. You’ve got this. All of this.

Amy’s Salad Dressing

From Amy, of crockpot Chicken Taco Chili fame. An easy, go-to, all-purpose dressing. Who loves ya Amy? We do!

Ingredients:

  • 1/3 olive oil
  • 1/3 lemon juice
  • 1T soy sauce
  • 1 garlic clove minced
  • Salt and pepper to taste.

Make it:

Shake in a mason jar and keep outside fridge.  It will get better by the day, as the garlic marinates.

Ina’s Vinaigrette (from THE Panzanella) and other tomato-y, basily, herby things.

1 teaspoon finely minced garlic
1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard
3 tablespoons Champagne vinegar
1/2 cup good olive oil
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Make it:

Shake it all up in a jar

Dana’s three ingredient Tahini Dressing

From Minimalist Baker, who uses it on things like her “Salads, Falafel, Fritters, Buddha Bowls, and more!”

Ingredients:

  • 1/3 cup tahini
  • 1 medium lemon, juiced (1 medium lemon yields ~3 Tbsp or 45 ml)
  • 1-2 Tbsp maple syrup (or sub agave – or honey if not vegan)
  • 1 pinch sea salt (optional)
  • 1 clove garlic (minced // optional)
  • Water (to thin // ~3-6 Tbsp or 45-90 ml as original recipe is written)

Make it:

To a medium mixing bowl, add tahini, lemon juice, and maple syrup. If adding salt and garlic, add now (optional). Whisk to combine. Then slowly add water until creamy and pourable. The mixture may seize up and thicken at first, but continue adding water a little at a time and whisking until creamy and smooth. Store leftovers in the refrigerator up to 5 days (sometimes longer*).

*Oh Dana, you do not know me! I can work this for a month.

Ina’s Curry Dressing

From Ina Garten’s couscous salad, or use on any grain you like (the quinoa version coming soon right here).

1/4 cup plain yogurt
1/4 cup good olive oil
1 teaspoon white wine vinegar
1 teaspoon curry powder
1/4 teaspoon ground turmeric
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Make it:

Whisk or shake it all up until emulsified. Add 1Tbsp water if using greek yogurt to get it smooth

Andy’s Caesar Dressing

From Andy’s East Coast Kitchen (goes with an excellent Caesar pasta salad)

Ingredients:

  • 1/2 cup Light Mayo
  • 1 tbsp Dijon Mustard
  • 2 Galic Cloves minced
  • 1/2 Lemon juiced
  • 1 tsp Worcestershire Sauce
  • 1 1/2 tbsp Capers chopped
  • 1 tsp Black Pepper
  • 1 pinch Kosher Salt

 Make it:

Mix it all up in a bowl.

Edie’s Creamy Soy Dressing (From Hero Slaw)

(Also used by Pierce’s Inn for a simple, lusty kale salad with toasted pecans)

Ingredients:

  • 3 tablespoons white wine vinegar
  • 3 tablespoons sugar
  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • 1 clove peeled and minced garlic
  • 1/2 teaspoon Asian sesame oil
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
  • 1/4 teaspoon cayenne
  • 1 cup mayonnaise,

Make it:

Combine all ingredients except mayo and stir or shake in container until sugar dissolves. Gradually whisk (or shake) in 1 cup mayonnaise until blended.

Caroline’s Curry Cashew Dressing

From Caroline Chambers Thai Chicken Chop

 While you’re at it make it a double batch. It keeps in the fridge for a week or in the freezer through the apocalypse

Ingredients:

  • 1/2 cup roasted salted cashews
  • 1/2 cup cilantro leaves and stems
  • Juice of 1 lime
  • 1 tablespoon red curry paste
  • 1 tablespoon sesame oil
  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons rice wine vinegar
  • 1 tablespoon maple syrup or honey
  • Pinch of salt
  • 1/3 to 1/2 cup water

Make it:

Place 1/2 cup roasted salted cashews into a blender and cover with warm water. Set aside to soak. Drain the liquid out of the blender and add the remaining dressing ingredients (1/2 cup cilantro leaves and stems, juice of 1 lime, 1 tablespoon red curry paste, 1 tablespoon sesame oil, 1 tablespoon soy sauce, 2 tablespoons rice wine vinegar, 1 tablespoon maple syrup or honey, pinch of salt, and water — start with 1/3 cup). Blend on high speed until smooth. If it’s too thick, blend in 1 tablespoon of water at a time until you get the right consistency.

Finally, the most labor intensive of the lot, but worth it! (plus it makes a boat load)

Mason’s Creamy Date and Shallot Dressing

From Mason McNulty’s recipe trove, and don’t skimp on the salad crack topping!

Ingredients:

  • 1 tablespoon dijon mustard
  • 2 ounces (~1/2 cup) dried dates, measured with pits
  • 1 small shallot (~1⁄4 cup)
  • 1⁄2 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 1⁄3 cup +1 tablespoon olive oil
  • Salt and pepper

Make it:

Pit and roughly chop dates. Finely chop the shallot

Combine the dates, the shallots, mustard and apple cider vinegar in a blender (a bullet blender if you’ve got it).

Blend until well combined but still somewhat chunky

Add the olive oil plus a big pinch of salt and a few cranks of pepper and blend until very smooth and emulsified. It will look like tahini! Taste and adjust seasonings as necessary.

Dressing will solidify in the fridge, but you can re-warm it by running warm water on the sides and shaking the container you stored it in!

Ba da Bing! Happy back end of summer to all!

A Side of Summer: Chile Crisp Tomato Dumpling Salad

Oh frozen dumplings and potstickers, where have you been all my life? I mean, I’ve seen you there in the freezer, but I never knew the slacker potential I was missing. And I never knew you could branch out beyond your comfort food role to star in a summer salad.

And yet…behold this new summer staple, which apparently “went viral” moments after I made it for the first time.

I’m calling this the side of summer vs the salad of summer because the dumplings definitely take it out of pure salad territory. We’ll leave that for things like Hero Slaw, Summer Perfection Watermelon Tomato Salad, Massaged Kale Salad and the like. This is more along the lines of THE panzanella, which has the heft to carry the meal on its own, with a little sideshow of quelque chose.  

If you are not among her 214K followers, Hetty Lui Mack is a boss with chile crisp. Exhibit A, and B. My only modification to her creation is this: look at the preparation instructions on your chosen bag of dumplings, and if it is easier than the method in the recipe, go for it. Mine were way easier, and involved less oil. Whatev. Cook those dumplings however you like.

Tomato dumpling salad, how do I love thee?

I love that you can be served room temp and assembled just before people arrive. I love that you are one more way to justify the bottomless jar of chile crisp that always resides in my fridge. I love that you are easy to scale up and down and I love that you are even good with just ok tomatoes vs peak of summer amazing tomatoes. (Don’t be offended, but when nobody is looking in winter I may even try you with diced canned tomatoes.)

One more recommendation before you go: Chile crisp comes in many forms. Make this with any variety, as long as you know you love it. I recommend this homemade slacker version but have also made it with some excellent versions in my fridge. You do you.

Tomato Dumpling Salad with Chile Crisp Vinaigrette

Cred to the NYT and Hetty Lui McKinnon.

FOR THE SALAD

Ingredients:

  • ·  2½ pounds ripe tomatoes (any variety), cut into roughly 1- to 2-inch pieces (at room temperature)
  • ·  1 garlic clove, grated
  • ·  ½ cup basil leaves, torn
  • ·  Kosher salt (such as Diamond Crystal brand) and black pepper
  • ·  1 pound frozen potsticker dumplings (not thawed)
  • ·  Neutral oil, such as canola or vegetable
  • ·  1 to 2 tablespoons store-bought crispy fried shallots (optional)

FOR THE CHILE CRISP VINAIGRETTE:

  • ·  3 tablespoons chile crisp (or chile oil)
  • ·  2 tablespoons rice vinegar
  • ·  1 tablespoon soy sauce, or more to taste Steps

Method:

Place the tomatoes on a large serving plate or in a bowl. Add the garlic, half the basil leaves, 1 teaspoon of salt and a big pinch of black pepper. Toss to combine and set aside.

To make the vinaigrette, combine the chile crisp, rice vinegar and soy sauce and whisk to combine. Taste and if it needs more saltiness, add ½ teaspoon more soy sauce.

Heat a large (12-inch) nonstick or well-seasoned cast-iron skillet over medium high for 1 to 2 minutes until very hot. Add 1 to 2 tablespoons of oil and, working in batches, add the dumplings, flat-side down, and cook until the bottoms of the dumplings are lightly browned, 1 to 2 minutes. Immediately add about 1/4 cup of water to the pan, just enough to cover the base of the dumplings, then cover and cook until the water has evaporated, 3 to 4 minutes. (If your dumplings contain meat, cook for an extra 1 to 2 minutes, or according to packet instructions). Transfer the cooked dumplings to a plate and continue cooking the remaining dumplings.

To serve, place the warm dumplings over the tomato salad and drizzle with the chile crisp vinaigrette. Toss very gently. Top with the crispy fried shallots (if using) and the remaining basil leaves. Serve either while the dumplings are still warm or at room temperature.

Nutty Date Bark Bites

AKA, how to make every night date night.

Bark if you like dessert. Bark if you like healthy dessert. Bark if you like healthy, easy, ready-whenever-you-get-the-urge-because-it-hides-in-your-freezer dessert. We’re talking bark here, and not just any bark, but viral Instagram bark.

But first, a small apology. The entire reason I started this blog way back in 2013, was to have a place to keep my favorite go-to recipes in one place so I could a: share them and b: keep them all in one place to easily find them. When I find out that a recipe I have been making on repeat for nearly a year isn’t actually on the blog, that is a FOUL!

Case in point this easy, delicious not entirely unhealthy treat that has permanent real estate in my freezer. It is the ultimate aprés dinner sweet fix to put a hard stop to your day of eating. The recipe is similar to cocoa nutty balls in that it features the holy trinity of dates, nuts and chocolate. It is, however, way easier to pull off, because it involves no food processor and no rolling sticky stuff into balls.

This recipe came from Instagram, as do a few great things, many good things and shockingly many just ok things. It flashed into my feed often enough that I had to try it and can now say that this particular rabbit hole proved to be worthy.

This recipe is all about method, with basic proportions of three key ingredients that can be adjusted up or down, and an optional mid or top layer that lets you choose your own flavor/texture adventure.

Finally, it is the ultimate exercise in love-the-one-you’re-with. As in, use whatever nut butter and chocolate you have or like, and whatever optional add-ins inspire you. That said, don’t mess around with the dates. You need to go medjool (or a similar soft gooey date–not deglet) all the way for texture and malleability.

Ingredients

  • 24 ish medjool dates (room temperature for ease of smushing)
  • 1/2 cup drippy peanut butter or combo nut butter of choice
  • 3/4 cup dark chocolate—chips or chopped
  • 1 tsp coconut oil (optional but it makes it smoother)
  • flaky salt
  • Optional: 1/3 cup or so crunchy stuff like chopped nuts or crushed potato chips or popcorn for the Hero layer

Method:

  • Make the date mat: Pit the dates and line them up like soldiers with their smooth sides down.
  • Pack them down as best you can, ideally by rolling them between two sheets of parchment but you can also do this by greasing the bottom of a greased glass to smush them. You’re going for a date mat or carpet type of thing, so put a little effort into this.
  • Pour the nut butter over the dates and spread it around. If your nut butter is thick, warm it up a bit in the microwave so you can spread it easily.
  • Sprinkle on the optional hero layer. I have never done this step and have no complaints on the finished product, but I am sure the hero layer would elevate it. In many iterations of this recipe the hero layer is a sprinkling of chopped peanuts or almonds. I’ve also seen crushed popcorn or potato chips for the win. Toasted coconut, dried fruit or pretzels would be right up there too.
  • Pour on the chocolate: Melt chocolate and coconut oil in the microwave for 45-60 sec, stirring after 30 seconds if you remember to. Stir until smooth and pour chocolate over your now impressive looking nut butter covered date mat. Smooth it all out. Sprinkle some flaky salt on top and put it into the freezer.
  • Try to forget about it for at least 30 minutes and then cut it into whatever size squares make you happy. The pre-cut pieces can be stored in the fridge but I prefer the texture and the out-of-sightness of the freezer.  

Note: chocolate should ideally be dark and high quality, but honestly that half bag of semisweet Nestle chips in your cupboard is just fine. When you open your freezer after dinner and see these at the ready you are going to be happy you were not so picky, and used what you had.

If you are looking for a date bark rabbit hole to go down, I recommend starting here with thathealthjunkie, one of the OG date bark masters. Her sesame snap date bark creation here looks epic.

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake

Red alert to early adopters: for some reason the first version of this listed milk twice in the ingredients. It’s fixed now, but I apologize for any sad thin shakes the mistake may have caused. May all your clovers be four-leafed.

If you’ve been on my train for any length of time, you know I have a thing about Shamrock Shakes. They are part of our family lore, from when I was a kid through when my now-grown kids were kids, to right now when we all are just looking for excuses to be kids. The truly devoted can read an excellent brief history of the Shamrock Shake right here. For obvious reasons—like seasonality and general health—Shamrock Shakes are more therapeutic tool than dietary staple.

That is, until now!

Yes folks, I have discovered how to drink Shamrock Shakes whenever the heck I want and feel good about it. It’s the perfect thing for spring when a lot of us are trying to clean up our acts after a winter of aprés ski. This DIY version is cool, creamy, refreshing and just sweet enough to feel fun, yet responsible. It’s also substantial enough to fill the cracks without being a calorie bomb that makes you feel sad in 20 minutes.

This version passed the husband test, the kid test, the friend test, the easy test and the healthy test. You can take it in whatever direction you choose: make it healthier by adding hempy, flaxy, seedy things; make it treatier by subbing frozen yogurt for the yogurt.   

Huge shout out and thanks to Andy’s East Coast Kitchen for this one. The only things I tweaked were trying with almond milk (yes!), and backing off on the mint extract because the pure stuff is high test (batch 1, of many, was a little harsh). But as ever, you do you.

I am now semi addicted to this version of Shamrock Shakes, and looking forward to the mint that takes over my garden every year.

Cheers to you, and to a happy, tasty spring!

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake

Lightly adapted from Andy’s East Coast Kitchen

Makes 1 very generous serving, or two for skeptics

Ingredients

  • 3/4 cup milk of choice
  • 1/2 cup plain greek lowfat yogurt (or thick yogurt of choice)
  • 1 cup spinach
  • 1 Tbsp honey
  • 1/2 cup frozen banana (½ large banana)
  • ~15 mint leaves
  • ¼ tsp mint extract
  • 1/2 cup ice
  • shaved/grated chocolate for garnish (optional—never gone there but why not?)

Method:

Whir it all up in a blender until creamy and uniformly green. Pour into a glass/glasses and grate a little chocolate on top for the pro version.

Notes:

For max creaminess make sure the banana pieces are fully frozen. I keep a stash of cut up bananas in the freezer so they break up easily in the blender (and to remove the baking pressure of over-ripe bananas on the counter)

Don’t leave it blending forever or it’ll heat up and be more like shamrock milk. Not so lucky.

If you are light on bananas, or want an extra boost of creamy nutrition sub in or add some avocado. You may want to add more sweetener if you are replacing the banana.

Thanks to sister B, who pointed me to a super cool and easy-to-use recipe analyzer, this shake comes with nutritional stats. Sadly, I have not cracked the code (literally) to getting it to display on the site, but I’m working on it. In the meantime, some deets:

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake: 233 calories (211 with almond milk); 2.7 grams fat; 27 grams sugar.
VS
Mickey D’s small Shamrock Shake: 460 calories; 13 grams fat; 63 g sugar

All the heft and taste, none of the effort

Dirt Bread 2.0: Gluten-Free Cottage Cheese Bread

People who know me or have seen me cook know that I am the slacker queen. It’s not that I cut corners entirely out of laziness. I cut them to find an easier way to a just-as-good or better outcome. These it no victory quite like winning the short-cut.

Case in point: Slacker chile crisp, which takes a fraction of the time effort and ingredients of the original chile crisp (PS interesting article on how chili crisp took over America right here), and which I now prefer. And then there are funitella bruschetta and easiest tomato soup both of which I will always and unapologetically make with canned tomatoes. Don’t get me started on sourdough. Not a chance I am going through that when I can make easiest French bread ever with ~3 minutes of active time.

So that brings me to today’s recipe for a nut-free, gluten-free bread that is reminiscent of the famous lifechanging loaf of bread (AKA Dirt Bread); BUT it requires fewer (and more normal) ingredients, and half the effort. As with all things miraculous, it came from Instagram, from a fleeting place I have never re-found. Let’s say a little prayer for screen shots.

A word here about gluten. I am a fan. I am also a little over-glutened at the moment, having taken a class at Gesine Bullock Prado’s Sugar Glider Kitchen. Her classes sell out in minutes so there not a chance I would have gotten this opportunity had it not been for Suzi the Great, knower of all the best things in life and giver of same. I now know how to properly cream butter and sugar (it takes forever), why to use room temperature eggs, Baker’s math, the virtues of cheap disposable pie pans, how to make and use a proper Swiss buttercream and so much more. I can’t wait to deploy my knowledge bombs for deliciousness

But there are times when that heft and chew of a dense, seedy, substantial bread is needed. And there are times when your gluten-free, nut-free people need something homemade and yummy. You could make them rustic Everyone Crackers OR you could be hero with a fraction of the effort and make this. It gets its body from oats, cottage cheese and eggs and its texture/cha-cha from flax, sesame and sunflower seeds. We’re talking pretty basic ingredients, and no rising involved. You just mix everything up, shape it into a football as best you can and bake it for an hour.

If you like Dirt Bread you will love this. If you’ve never committed to Dirt Bread, ease into the concept by trying this first.

What this is:

  • Easy
  • Quick (for bread)
  • Delicious
  • Gluten- and nut-free
  • High-protein
  • Cheapish

What this is not

  • Vegan
  • Yeasted
  • Shelf-stable: Store it in the fridge or sliced in the freezer

I am so sorry Vegans. Between the cottage cheese and the eggs, I’m seeing a lot of high risk substitutions, but please do let me know if you crack the code! Also, the mystery poster of this was a Brit, so all measurements are in grams. I approximated volume measurements, but live a little! Putting a bowl on a scale (<$20 people), adding each ingredient and zeroing it out after each addition is way easier and more accurate.

Dirt Bread 2.0: Gluten-Free Cottage Cheese Bread

Preheat oven to 360

Ingredients

500 grams cottage cheese (about 2 cups)
3 eggs
300 grams oats (about 3 cups)
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp salt
50 grams flaxseed, heaping ¼ cup
50 grams sunflower seeds,  1/3 cup
50 grams pumpkin seeds, scant ½  cup
Optional but advised, 50 grams dried fruit of choice (cranberries are my jam, and I usually but not always chop them a bit)

 

Method

  • Combine all the ingredients in a bowl. Mix well, making sure everything is completely mushed together (no yellow yolk streaks and break down the big chunks of cottage cheese).  Dump it onto a parchment-lined pan and use your hands to shape it the into your best, well-packed loaf like shape.
  • Bake 1 hour

Cool completely before slicing. This is key to it holding it’s shape so…patience! Store in fridge or (my fave) slice and store, wrapped tightly, in freezer so you can grab a slice or two and toast it up as needed.

The pre-baked, nice, tight football-like loaf

 

 

 

Happy Day Noodles

This started out yesterday as a sad pathetic post about life and lemons and fresh starts, a post that was killing my will to live as I wrote it. And then today…it snowed! The instant mood shift makes me realize how closely snow is connected to my psyche. I suspect everyone has a natural Prozac. Snow is mine.

I grew up loving March because it meant sun and snow and spring skiing and friends. It was the cap-off to a good winter or a bad winter but a winter in any case. This year, by the time March rolled around in these parts, it felt like winter never really started and then decided to throw in the towel early. I did the same, giving up on winter entirely in the beginning of March. Just looking at my weather app made everything feel so wrong, so sad, so hopeless. So I stopped.

But then, this snow storm comes out of nowhere, entirely burying cars (unheard of in this hood), and delivering a proper snow day—one that stops everything and everyone from doing whatever they were doing and going wherever they were going.

It took me back to the “Storm of 82” which featured a whopper late March snowstorm that coincided with my 16th birthday amidst a houseful of older ski racers. By then we’d been snowbound for nearly a week, so supplies were running low while boredom was peaking. When someone put peppermint schnapps in his hot chocolate at breakfast, it just made sense.

This recipe pays homage to great snow days, that are all about hunkering in with whoever you’re with, and eating whatever you’ve got. It requires ingredients that are likely to persist in even the leanest, picked-over kitchen.

Officially, they are known as Eric Kim’s peanut butter noodles, and also midnight noodles, for reasons that will be obvious to anyone stumbling home late and hungry.

There are so many things I like about this recipe:

  • First, it hits the trifecta of being easy, cheap and tasty.
  • It uses ingredients most people would have in their kitchen at any given time.
  • You can dress it up or dress it down. Did I stir in some chile crisp? Hell yes! Would it welcome a protein or veggies? Hell yes again! It is also just right nekkid, as is.  
  • It’s versatile. It works with ramen and spaghetti and I’ll wager with any pasta type thing you can scare up in your pantry. Vegan or gluten-free adaptations? Child’s play!
  • Finally, I love that it is deemed a single serving, so if you do manage to plow through the whole bowl, which would be impressive, you can take some comfort in knowing it was pre-ordained.

I’m here to tell you that you need not wait until a late night or a snow day to make this. Make this whenever the heck you need something quick and tasty and satisfying. Here’s hoping you enjoy your Sunday, or Snow Day or whatever day you’ve got.

Happy Day Noodles

AKA Eric Kim’s Peanut Butter Noodles
Makes 1 very generous serving

Ingredients:

  • Salt
  • 4 ounces spaghetti or 1 individual package instant ramen (seasoning packet saved for another use)
  • 2 tablespoons creamy peanut butter (low-budget recommended, but I used the chunky good stuff and it was just fine)
  • 1 tablespoon unsalted butter
  • 1 tablespoon finely grated Parmesan, plus more for serving
  • 1 teaspoon soy sauce

Method:

  1. Bring a pot of water to a boil (and salt it, if using spaghetti). Cook the noodles according to package instructions. Reserve 1/2 cup of the cooking water, then drain the noodles and return to the pot. Turn off the heat.
  2. Add the peanut butter, butter, Parmesan and soy sauce. Vigorously stir the noodles for a minute, adding some reserved cooking water, a tablespoon or two at a time, until the sauce is glossy and clings to the noodles. Season to taste with salt.
  3. Top with more cheese, if you’d like, and serve immediately

Note: I made this for the first time and it got six thumbs up (from three people). Two more unexpected visitors arrived later that day and I made another batch, earning it four more thumbs up. So, that’s two batches and seven thumbs up, with no extra ingredients. It does the job!

Coo Coo for Koulourakia

Today I am getting my Greek on. I have exactly zero Mediterranean blood in my veins, but I have some in my heart. This thanks to my favorite Greek friends, who are warm and sometimes fiery; they are generous in spirit, passionate in their beliefs and above all FUN.

One of my faves recently enlisted my son in making a mega batch of traditional Greek cookies, Koulourakia. Seeing them in the kitchen together via Facetime, working on the cookie-production line, made me smile. It reminded me of being in the kitchen with my own mom.

As we have documented here on this blog, Nina was not invested in cooking unless the cooking was collateral necessity for some messy crafting or shenanigans that brought together kids or grandkids. Despite her own holiday baking ennui, she encouraged us to pursue our own culinary itches, which were usually things that bore little resemblance to the magazine pictures that had inspired us. Cases in point: rock-hard pretzels from ZOOM (the show not the app), a gloppy soft cheese “pine cone” flavored with bacon bits and studded with almonds, dentally challenging popcorn balls, and so, so many more.  

My point is….Nina had her priorities straight. Our holiday kitchen experiments brought us together in one place. The only really important part about the holidays are the people—the family you are born into and the family you grow into. If you’re living a rich life, that family ends up being big and varied and sprinkled all over the country, if not the globe.

That is why seeing the kitchen production half a country away inspired me to try out the Koulourakia recipe I’ve been eyeing (and trying to pronounce) for quite a while. The cookies did not disappoint and will be a holiday staple here. They are sturdy, keep well, travel well and as a bonus are both nut-free and Vegan. They’re low-key addictive—not quite as sweet as a cookie, and less of a commitment than a muffin, making them the perfect late morning or mid-afternoon accompaniment to a cup of something comforting. Book group? Cookie exchange? Hostess gift? Holiday snack arsenal for unexpected guests? Yes and yes on down the line.

There are admittedly many versions of Koulourakia, using seasonal flavors and sweeteners, or butter vs olive oil. I went with Mina Stone’s favorite orange- and cinnamon-flavored version, from her book Lemon, Love and Olive Oil, (purchased at the always magical Woody’s Mercantile). She does the pro option of brushing the tops with honey water and pressing the cookies in sesame seeds. Other versions skip the honey wash and simply roll the rope in sesame seeds before forming the cookies into a circle. You do you, preferably in a messy kitchen with good company and an excellent playlist!

       Koulourakia, Colorado version

Koulourakia

From Lemon, Love and Olive Oil

 Ingredients

The Wet Ingredients:

  • 1/2 cup (120 ml) light olive oil or vegetable oil
  • 1/2 cup tahini (120 ml)
  • 1 cup (240 ml) orange juice
  • 1 cup (200g) granulated sugar

The Dry Ingredients:

  • 4 cups (480g) all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 teaspoons baking soda
  • 2 teaspoons kosher salt
  • 4 teaspoons ground cinnamon

Topping:

  • 1 Tbsp honey
  • ½ cup water
  • ½  cup sesame seeds

Method

Preheat the oven to 350 °F, 180 °C

Line 2-3 baking trays with parchment paper.

Make the Cookie Dough:

  • Combine all of the dry ingredients in a bowl and whisk them together.
  • Combine all of the wet ingredients in a large bowl and whisk them together. Add the dry ingredients in 2-3 batches and whisk together. Switch to a spatula and mix until a smooth soft dough, adding another spoonful of flour if it’s too sticky. Cover loosely with a towel and set aside to rest for 20 minutes.

Make the Cookies:

  • Take about a tablespoon of dough and roll it into a ball. Roll the ball into a 5-inch (12-13 cm) long rope. Shape it into an S or into a circle.
  • Dissolve 1 Tbsp honey in 1 cup water. Form the cookies on the baking tray, brush tops with honey/water mixture then press each cookie into sesame seeds and replace on sheet. Alternatively, roll the rope in the sesame and then place on the prepared baking pan. 
  • Bake the cookies 13-15 minutes, until golden brown on the bottom and lightly toasted on top). Cool on rack.
  • Transfer the cookies to cookie jars or to an airtight container and store at room temperature up to 2 weeks.

Serve with cozy bevvie of choice, or go full Greek and shake up a cold frappe. It’s totally a thing.

     Traditional yodeling marmots and Koulourakia unite!

Thanksgifting

As the rest of you are toiling away in the kitchen, taking or giving orders and wondering why every year it takes so much brainpower to figure out turkey math, I’ll be cooking…nothing. I’m not that happy about it. To me, a proper Thanksgiving involves an element of chaos. This from the second youngest of 12 grandchildren, whose clan always gathered en masse for Thanksgiving; that is, except for the rare occasion when Thanksgiving coincided with a powder day, in which case Thanksgiving was a do-over at Howard Johnsons on the drive home from the mountains Sunday. As I grew into personhood and became a ski racer, Thanksgiving was always an away game, taking place wherever we were training for the start of the season.  

Perhaps that is why, to me, Thanksgiving is less sacred than rogue. I love taking on too many cooking projects, making old favorites, enjoying the satisfaction of new recipes that are surprisingly good (Knock-Out Vegan Pumpkin Pie), and suffering the consequences of epic fails (pretzels that could break your teeth). Ideally, there’s a little bit of all that going on, and nobody really remembers the food anyway because of the chaos and the company.

With the kids gone on their own ski racing journeys, our Thanksgivings have become very small affairs. This year, my culinary responsibilities come down to making a mustard dill sauce for smoked salmon. This task takes all of three ingredients and five minutes, if you are a slow chopper.

It’s is a solid recipe, from one of my few remaining cookbooks, The Silver Palate Cookbook. I have the 1982 edition, with “Thys” penciled in my Mom’s handwriting on the inside cover. As the stains throughout attest, this baby has lived on the front lines for many a Thanksgiving.

Here is the recipe in its entirety, though I’ll be making ¼ recipe which will still be too much:

Dill Mustard Sauce

from the Silver Palate Cookbook

  • 1 cup sweet mustard (the really sweet honey ham stuff)
  • 1 cup sour cream
  • ½ cup chopped fresh dill

Mix all ingredients together. Cover and refrigerate until ready to use.

And that, my friends, is all am making for Thanksgiving; but it just feels wrong, so I’ll bring something else for sure. Bringing an unassigned dish to a small Thanksgiving, however, can be tricky. You don’t want to boss a new dish on everyone when the pressure is on to try it and enjoy it; or steal the host’s mojo by creating a direct competitor to a favorite dish.

It has to be something that can be easily served as a complement, and/or politely stored away for another occasion. If you happen to be in this situation, here are a few suggestions:

You’ll never go wrong with nuts, especially at the holidays. Honey thyme walnuts go well with any cheese spread, and anything from the Bring It nut anthology can stand alone. The app table can always use some substantial Everyone Crackers that accommodate most all special diets, except sesame allergies.

A jar of chili crisp will add a little sass to the turkey without stealing any cranberry thunder (they’re definitely different food groups). Homemade granola is a good call, especially if you are staying over. Press the Easy button with Tahini Granola (sorry again sesame allergy peeps), or super healthy Seed Bark Granola or my current fave Judson’s Crispy Granola from Martha’s Vineyard Magazine.

If you can’t cook, you also can’t come empty-handed. (Huge bonus points for anyone with vintage miniature Pilgrim candles btw). You’re never going to go wrong with flowers, a bag of good coffee, a box of chocolates or a bottle of something fun. Might I suggest Ancho Reyes, which can spice up any margarita or Bloody Mary, either of which may come in handy when the family’s been together for a few days.

That’s all I’ve got for now, because I must go chop my handful of dill and rest. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!

For the host who has everything, rice krispy  turkey legs are just the thing.