Monthly Archives: April 2024

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake

Red alert to early adopters: for some reason the first version of this listed milk twice in the ingredients. It’s fixed now, but I apologize for any sad thin shakes the mistake may have caused. May all your clovers be four-leafed.

If you’ve been on my train for any length of time, you know I have a thing about Shamrock Shakes. They are part of our family lore, from when I was a kid through when my now-grown kids were kids, to right now when we all are just looking for excuses to be kids. The truly devoted can read an excellent brief history of the Shamrock Shake right here. For obvious reasons—like seasonality and general health—Shamrock Shakes are more therapeutic tool than dietary staple.

That is, until now!

Yes folks, I have discovered how to drink Shamrock Shakes whenever the heck I want and feel good about it. It’s the perfect thing for spring when a lot of us are trying to clean up our acts after a winter of aprés ski. This DIY version is cool, creamy, refreshing and just sweet enough to feel fun, yet responsible. It’s also substantial enough to fill the cracks without being a calorie bomb that makes you feel sad in 20 minutes.

This version passed the husband test, the kid test, the friend test, the easy test and the healthy test. You can take it in whatever direction you choose: make it healthier by adding hempy, flaxy, seedy things; make it treatier by subbing frozen yogurt for the yogurt.   

Huge shout out and thanks to Andy’s East Coast Kitchen for this one. The only things I tweaked were trying with almond milk (yes!), and backing off on the mint extract because the pure stuff is high test (batch 1, of many, was a little harsh). But as ever, you do you.

I am now semi addicted to this version of Shamrock Shakes, and looking forward to the mint that takes over my garden every year.

Cheers to you, and to a happy, tasty spring!

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake

Lightly adapted from Andy’s East Coast Kitchen

Makes 1 very generous serving, or two for skeptics

Ingredients

  • 3/4 cup milk of choice
  • 1/2 cup plain greek lowfat yogurt (or thick yogurt of choice)
  • 1 cup spinach
  • 1 Tbsp honey
  • 1/2 cup frozen banana (½ large banana)
  • ~15 mint leaves
  • ¼ tsp mint extract
  • 1/2 cup ice
  • shaved/grated chocolate for garnish (optional—never gone there but why not?)

Method:

Whir it all up in a blender until creamy and uniformly green. Pour into a glass/glasses and grate a little chocolate on top for the pro version.

Notes:

For max creaminess make sure the banana pieces are fully frozen. I keep a stash of cut up bananas in the freezer so they break up easily in the blender (and to remove the baking pressure of over-ripe bananas on the counter)

Don’t leave it blending forever or it’ll heat up and be more like shamrock milk. Not so lucky.

If you are light on bananas, or want an extra boost of creamy nutrition sub in or add some avocado. You may want to add more sweetener if you are replacing the banana.

Thanks to sister B, who pointed me to a super cool and easy-to-use recipe analyzer, this shake comes with nutritional stats. Sadly, I have not cracked the code (literally) to getting it to display on the site, but I’m working on it. In the meantime, some deets:

Spring Cleaning Shamrock Shake: 233 calories (211 with almond milk); 2.7 grams fat; 27 grams sugar.
VS
Mickey D’s small Shamrock Shake: 460 calories; 13 grams fat; 63 g sugar

All the heft and taste, none of the effort

Dirt Bread 2.0: Gluten-Free Cottage Cheese Bread

People who know me or have seen me cook know that I am the slacker queen. It’s not that I cut corners entirely out of laziness. I cut them to find an easier way to a just-as-good or better outcome. These it no victory quite like winning the short-cut.

Case in point: Slacker chile crisp, which takes a fraction of the time effort and ingredients of the original chile crisp (PS interesting article on how chili crisp took over America right here), and which I now prefer. And then there are funitella bruschetta and easiest tomato soup both of which I will always and unapologetically make with canned tomatoes. Don’t get me started on sourdough. Not a chance I am going through that when I can make easiest French bread ever with ~3 minutes of active time.

So that brings me to today’s recipe for a nut-free, gluten-free bread that is reminiscent of the famous lifechanging loaf of bread (AKA Dirt Bread); BUT it requires fewer (and more normal) ingredients, and half the effort. As with all things miraculous, it came from Instagram, from a fleeting place I have never re-found. Let’s say a little prayer for screen shots.

A word here about gluten. I am a fan. I am also a little over-glutened at the moment, having taken a class at Gesine Bullock Prado’s Sugar Glider Kitchen. Her classes sell out in minutes so there not a chance I would have gotten this opportunity had it not been for Suzi the Great, knower of all the best things in life and giver of same. I now know how to properly cream butter and sugar (it takes forever), why to use room temperature eggs, Baker’s math, the virtues of cheap disposable pie pans, how to make and use a proper Swiss buttercream and so much more. I can’t wait to deploy my knowledge bombs for deliciousness

But there are times when that heft and chew of a dense, seedy, substantial bread is needed. And there are times when your gluten-free, nut-free people need something homemade and yummy. You could make them rustic Everyone Crackers OR you could be hero with a fraction of the effort and make this. It gets its body from oats, cottage cheese and eggs and its texture/cha-cha from flax, sesame and sunflower seeds. We’re talking pretty basic ingredients, and no rising involved. You just mix everything up, shape it into a football as best you can and bake it for an hour.

If you like Dirt Bread you will love this. If you’ve never committed to Dirt Bread, ease into the concept by trying this first.

What this is:

  • Easy
  • Quick (for bread)
  • Delicious
  • Gluten- and nut-free
  • High-protein
  • Cheapish

What this is not

  • Vegan
  • Yeasted
  • Shelf-stable: Store it in the fridge or sliced in the freezer

I am so sorry Vegans. Between the cottage cheese and the eggs, I’m seeing a lot of high risk substitutions, but please do let me know if you crack the code! Also, the mystery poster of this was a Brit, so all measurements are in grams. I approximated volume measurements, but live a little! Putting a bowl on a scale (<$20 people), adding each ingredient and zeroing it out after each addition is way easier and more accurate.

Dirt Bread 2.0: Gluten-Free Cottage Cheese Bread

Preheat oven to 360

Ingredients

500 grams cottage cheese (about 2 cups)
3 eggs
300 grams oats (about 3 cups)
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp salt
50 grams flaxseed, heaping ¼ cup
50 grams sunflower seeds,  1/3 cup
50 grams pumpkin seeds, scant ½  cup
Optional but advised, 50 grams dried fruit of choice (cranberries are my jam, and I usually but not always chop them a bit)

 

Method

  • Combine all the ingredients in a bowl. Mix well, making sure everything is completely mushed together (no yellow yolk streaks and break down the big chunks of cottage cheese).  Dump it onto a parchment-lined pan and use your hands to shape it the into your best, well-packed loaf like shape.
  • Bake 1 hour

Cool completely before slicing. This is key to it holding it’s shape so…patience! Store in fridge or (my fave) slice and store, wrapped tightly, in freezer so you can grab a slice or two and toast it up as needed.

The pre-baked, nice, tight football-like loaf