I was going to post this on the weekend, but I’m your friend and friends don’t do that. Weekends are about pancakes and muffins and doughnuts and bacon and omelets and cinnamon rolls and maple syrup. Always maple syrup. So, posting a smoothie with vegetables and beans on a weekend just feels wrong. But on a Monday? The gloves are off baby—this is what you get.
I have a friend who is gorgeous (I have quite a few of those) and she once explained to me her diet philosophy of being “all about oatmeal” during the week, and then loosening up on the weekends. Clearly it works for her, and it leaves ample room for both discipline and fun.
On to this smoothie, which firmly belongs in the weekday repertoire. I’ll never lie to you. I’ll never tell you “this tastes just like a milkshake” or “you’d never know this was healthy” or that your loved ones will beg you to make this or that you will not be mocked when you open a can of beans for breakfast. But I will tell you I am mildly addicted to this because sometimes the cold goodness of a very healthy smoothie that is packed with nutrition from real ingredients is really comforting. And sometimes, well, I just need to get beyond the oatmeal.
If this intrigues you, I hope you try it and enjoy it. If the concept of this grosses you out, I hope you have a nice week and I will see you with something more fun very soon. Happy Monday!
Makes 1 huge or 2 small smoothies (as pictured above)
- 1 frozen banana
- 1 cup frozen cauliflower (the riced stuff in the freezer section is best)
- ½ cup black beans
- 1-2 medjool dates pitted (2! or more if they are deglet)
- 1 cup oat milk or milk of choice (use what you’ve got)
- 1 tablespoon hemp seeds
- 1 tablespoon cocoa powder
- 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
- Place all ingredients into a blender. Blend until smooth. (really smooth!)
- Pour into a glass and sprinkle hemp seeds over the top if desired. Serve immediately.
NOTES: You need an aggressive blender — or a lot of blending in an ok one — to really get this smooth, which is key. Gooey Medjool dates are ideal here, and I say live a little and add another if you need to ease into this. If you only have deglet, or if your medjools are a little dry, cut them up and rehydrate them with some boiling water (or a bit of your morning coffee supply) for a few minutes. You can also use an unfrozen banana and add some ice cubes, which also helps with the crappy blender situation.